Newsletters

Autumn 2020

I am currently in two online women’s groups—one a small group that formed out of a larger group called Awakening Women to Transform the World led by Sara Vetter and Lynne Twist.  The 8 women in this group were inspired to continue the momentum and ideas presented to us in the “mother group”.  The other group meets weekly for 9 months and we are carefully and systematically working our way through the 12 steps (of Alcoholics Anonymous) and The 12 Efforts (as revised by Tommy Rosen).  Each group has a different focus, yet the topics tend to coalesce. What I learn from one group often dovetails with the teachings from the other.  For instance, one week in my 12 Efforts group, I voiced my discomfort with the language in the Big Book, which is very masculine and patriarchal.  That same week, the Awakening Women’s group focused on the constructs of the patriarchy and how damaging it is to women and men alike.

Lynne Twist asked us in the original Awakening Women’s group to take a stand for something that moves us, that we feel deeply passionate about.  As I explored my trigger points with the Big Book (BB) and wrote about it, I realized that what was emerging was to take a stand for women who have been wounded as a result of living under patriarchal rule for thousands of years. 

In my 12 Efforts Group, we are studying addictions and recovery, using the Big Book, and other writings. The Big Book was written in the 1930s by men and, initially, for men only.  It is still used today as a basis for 12 step programs.  It is important to know that you do not have to have a substance issue to have an addiction issue. Substance addictions are alcohol, drugs (cocaine, opiates, methamphetamines, nicotine, heroin, etc.); process addictions are food, sex, relationships, internet, among others; and thought addictions include self-doubt, negative thinking, procrastination, and resentments.  Most of us can identify with at least one thing in the above categories. 

In the Awakening Women’s group, we have been discussing how we hold ourselves back from being our full, powerful Selves, how we can easily get caught up in the pettiness of things such as self-judgment or comparing ourselves with other women to keep ourselves small.  We are being asked to drop the pettiness, to come together as women supporting women, to be a part of something bigger that benefits all people, the planet and nature. 

As I reflect upon how these topics merge, I realize that when women are stuck in patterns rooted in the patriarchy, they do not support each other, they compete. They step on each other rather than being in step with each other. The patriarchy promotes separation from the self, from the other, from nature and from spirit.  The patriarchy is hierarchal and dominating.  You see this played out as the rich dominate the poor, and women, people of color, children and the working class are valued less than the masculine “elite”, and therefore exploited, dominated and oppressed. It also shows up in our proclivity toward war—war on countries, war on drugs, war on poverty, war on cancer, always reacting to our suffering by creating more war. Self-control is revered, and “emotionality” is frowned upon.  Nature is seen as a thing to exploit, use, subdue, and convert into commodities for sale.

Trauma, which frequently leads to addictive behaviors, becomes the tool of the patriarchy to sustain itself—reaching back and forward through generations and becoming fertile ground for perpetuating behaviors, as we reactively yearn for anything that might alleviate our pain and separation.

Women are naturally relational and inter-connected beings. When women (and men) are in touch with their divine feminine energy, their birthright of connection, they become the healers of that pain and separation.

Addictions are grounded in the dysfunctions of the patriarchy. 

Would sexual abuse, abandonment, emotional abuse, physical abuse, attachment issues or trauma be present in a culture where the masculine and feminine were balanced, where the divine feminine was revered, honored and respected? 

In our Awakening Women’s group, we’ve been asked to take a stand for something that is meaningful to us, something that moves us.  When you take a stand, you move from a point of view or a position to rising above your point of view to seeing another reality. 

Lynne Twist Speaks About Taking a Stand

My healing work has led me to working with women and men who have issues with self-love around their bodies, and food and nourishment.  In a culture where we are bombarded daily with images of what women are supposed to look like, what they are supposed to wear, how they are supposed to feel and how they would feel if only they were this weight, or used this wrinkle-free cream, or had this surgery to correct this flaw etc., it’s not a wonder that so many of us feel so unhappy with our bodies and are so disconnected from them.  We live in our heads and judge ourselves for not being perfect. We have lost touch with our intuition—a gift that we as women inherently possess. 

Identifying and taking a stand can be fluid and mutable. 

Today, I take a stand for women to reclaim their divine feminine wisdom, to reclaim their bodies and to establish reverence in their lives, to live in coherence and interdependence with each other on this beautiful, precious planet Earth that we call home.

Healing Work:

My work as a healer has always been to help my clients and patients to heal their core wounds so they can step fully into their power and joy.  I help women and men identify and heal the wounds or beliefs of separation from the divine.  They come home to themselves, release the roots of addictions and know themselves as they truly are:  empowered, lovable and joyful.  From there, they can fully create the life of their dreams.

I invite you to reach out and join me on this magnificent journey to reclaim our Divine Feminine Power. The Earth needs you. You need you.  We need you. 

Read more from Lynne Twist about the relationship between money, the patriarchy, the distorted masculine, and what is possible when that energy is balanced and healed.

The Journey Continues

What a month June delivered to us. Astrologically, we experienced two eclipses. Mercury retrograde joined Venus retrograde and we welcomed the first day of summer and celebrated the longest day and shortest night of the year in the northern hemisphere. As the wheel of time continues to turn, we entered into the waning half of the year. Until the winter solstice, the light of the days will slowly shorten as the nights lengthen. Since we are in the height of summer, this will not be noticeable for a few months. But as we edge towards the autumnal equinox in September, the daylight hours will shorten and the temperatures will begin to cool. For us here in Arizona, that will be a welcomed relief!

The Adventure of Self-discovery

I have so much that I want to share with you this month. I continued my studies with Tommy Rosen and have experienced so much joy, insight, motivation and gratitude for his work and for the discoveries I have made. The 8-week intensive just completed and the 13-week Kundalini and Vinyasa yoga classes that I attended every weekday are on break for the month of July. Tommy is taking that time off to write and rest. He has given so much of his heart and soul to us students these past few months. We wish him well on his break. (If you are interested in finding out more about Tommy Rosen’s work, here is a link to his website and offerings.)

Continuing on The Path

I was contemplating what I was going to do after this course, having been so immersed in his work and with this tribe, but I didn’t have to wonder long. I met a beautiful student of Tommy’s and indeed a soul sister. She is taking me and 3 other women into a deep dive for the next 9 months starting mid-July. I am extremely excited to be a part of this adventure.

I continue to receive more and more information and guidance regarding my work as a healer and wellness and recovery coach. I am developing some juicy programs that I will roll out in fall. Meanwhile, I am open to working with anyone one-on-one via Zoom. (See details)

I ended my last newsletter promising you I would continue to take you on my journey of awakening with me. What follows is the next chapter on that journey. These offerings are a part of the memoir I am writing, with the intention to publish in 2021. I very much appreciated your comments and feedback after my May newsletter and continue to welcome them.

The Journey Continues
Chapter 2

Divine Grace

It was time to move from the wonderful Italian Villa near Healdsburg to my own home, so I began the search in earnest. I explored diligently from Santa Rosa to the northern Sonoma county line but found nothing suitable. Back to the drawing board! I created a “wish list”, a vision board, prayed and meditated. Soon after, I saw an ad for a house for rent in Cloverdale and drove up to take a look. It was perfect! I filled out the required paperwork and waited. I quickly received a call back from the property manager asking if I’d like to view the home. I found out later that many people had applied for this little gem. Why was I considered and chosen out of all the applicants? The only answer I have for that is Divine Grace.

The Move

My friends rallied to help me with this move. I had stuff in storage, stuff stored with friends and I needed to sort and release even more stuff. All in all, the move came together with as much ease as possible and I immediately settled into my little cottage in the quaint town of Cloverdale. I would be here for the next 2 years, enjoying the bucolic surroundings, hiking and biking among the hills and vineyards. In this peaceful setting, I was able to immerse myself in my spiritual practices. Alongside the beauty and quietness, there were also challenges—like trying to figure out how to make a living so far away from my previous work in Napa and Marin. And there were times when I was lonely. I had one friend in Cloverdale but knew no one else nearby. One day, as I was looking online for work, I noticed an ad for a nurse practitioner in an integrated health clinic. I applied and without ever being interviewed in person, I was hired and offered more money than was originally listed in the ad. I loved that job which took me to clinics in Rohnert Park, Santa Rosa and Ukiah. I particularly loved the patients in Ukiah—just down to earth folks, many were old hippies, some were professionals who were tired of the fast pace and high cost of living of the Bay Area and others just looking for a lifestyle more closely connected to the earth.

Settling In

For the next two years, I commuted to these clinics, kept a few hours at my Napa and Marin offices and saw a few clients in my home office. Even though I was driving a lot and getting tired of spending so many hours in my car, I loved this time of my life.

Change is the Only Constant

Two major events happened during this time that were completely unexpected. I met a man who would later become my life partner and change things significantly for me. And I would be offered a job that was different than anything I had ever done before. Todd moved in briefly with me in Cloverdale, but we would soon relocate to Petaluma to be closer to his work and to the San Francisco Airport since my new job required air travel.

As I look back at the events over those few years, it is clear to me now that only a presence so loving and so magnificent could have orchestrated this Divine Plan. As Tommy Rosen puts it, I felt that “my case was being considered.”

“Despite my worrying, my fretting and my fears, I was consistently carried and cared for by a benevolent loving energy of the Universe that I now identify as the Divine Mother. I began to see that even the challenges were there to develop my inner strength. “No mud, no lotus,” as Thich Nhat Han says.

Learning to Trust

In the next newsletter, I will share the adventures around my new job, establishing life in a partnership, my granddaughter’s decision to move in with us and our eventual move to Asia. I think by now you are seeing a central theme in my life: Divine Grace, guidance, protection—however you define it, is always present. Our task is to slow down long enough and learn to develop the stillness and intuition necessary to remove the blocks to listening and receiving that guidance.

Reconnecting

I am so excited to be reconnecting with you after many years of silence. The past few months have been unprecedented and many of us are trying to find our grounding in these uncertain times. Initially, I welcomed the reprieve from my busy travel/work schedule. A portal opened where I could slow down, meditate, rest, write and deepen my yoga practice. But, like many, I became concerned about money and how I would continue to support myself. Returning to my previous job anytime soon was not likely going to happen. I felt like the Universe was offering me a gift—the gift of time, space, slowing down. A time to go within. A time to listen to my inner GPS. Maybe there is another path for me to step onto rather than returning to my previous work. After all, while I loved my job, it didn’t really feel like my Soul’s calling and I’ve always felt like, at some point in time, I would return to my work as an energy healer, Medicine Woman, Shaman and health coach.

Now is that time.

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Where Have I Been?

In the spring of 2013, I accepted a job in Austin, Texas and was on track to rearrange and relocate my life. I sublet my apartment in Marin, packed my belongings, put some in storage, with the rest to be shipped to Texas. At the last minute, the job fell through. I was left stranded, not knowing where I was going or what I was going to do. Within minutes of telling a friend what had happened, she called me back to say that her boss was offering me her executive wine country home to live in rent free for a month while I figured things out. I jumped at the chance! Shoving the rest of my stuff in storage except for a few things that I would need for the month, I headed North. (I had no idea that I was about to embark on a 7-year journey that would eventually take me to Asia, India, Australia, the Middle East and finally back to the U.S.)

Settling into my temporary digs in the middle of Dry Creek Valley was not difficult. It was a beautiful, serene setting near hiking trails around Lake Sonoma. I had plenty of time on my hands—something that I wasn’t used to—and I took complete advantage of it. I spent time in nature, hiking or just sitting and meditating. I read and journaled. I still wasn’t clear what I was going to do when the month was up and was getting concerned when I got another phone call.  A friend of mine who lived close by had an emergency appendectomy and during the procedure they found some atypical cells that could indicate cancer. After her recovery from the appendectomy, she had to undergo another surgery to remove part of her colon, as a precaution.  She and her husband asked me if I would come stay with them in their picturesque Italian villa nestled in their Zinfandel vineyards to help nurse her back to health. I would have my own en-suite and could stay with them rent free in exchange for my nursing skills.  As my friend’s health improved, my role transformed from caregiver to something more akin to a sister. We agreed that I would pay rent for my room and become a part of their household for the next 6 months. To extend my respite from my previous hectic work/life schedule was just what my body and soul needed. For the next 6 months my life looked vastly different than it had for many years. I had a chance to rest, see a few clients, journal, meditate, get back into nature, socialize and contemplate. I could see that the Universe was indeed taking care of me, yet I wasn’t able to fully relax into that knowing. I kept wondering and, at times, worrying. What was I supposed to do next when this time in Shangri-La ended?

forking paths

Despite all the fretting and worrying, I was gradually developing a trust in the Universe through my spiritual practices. I read books such as E-Squared by Pam Grout, I Can See Clearly Now and Wishes Fulfilled by Wayne Dyer, The Law of Divine Compensation by Marianne Williamson, Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself by Joe Dispenza and many more.  I listened to affirmations, guided meditations, prayed to my spiritual teacher Amma, journaled with fervor, and continued my yoga practice. While I was at the early stages of learning this “trust” lesson, it has turned out to be the one of the core lessons and profound shifts of my life, ultimately leading me to uncover my purpose or “Dharma”.

In my next newsletter, I will continue to write about my adventures and what transpired in the next chapter in this saga:  where I would be living, what I would be doing and the struggles and shifts that were occurring on my inner landscape. My intention is to help you discover, as I have, that the universe really does have our backs. It always has. And to not only believe it, or know it intellectually, but to really feel it and experience it, trust it and allow it to be your Guiding Light. There is a conscious, loving energy all around us and if we can learn to invite it in with unfolded arms and an open heart, we can experience life as a joyful and profound gift. I have come to accept that every challenge I am given is really an opportunity to grow into my divine soulful Self.


Working with Rachelle

Nothing would bring me more joy than to share my healing practices with you to help you find your footing so you can evolve, and fully experience your joyous birthright as a spiritual being—learning to relish the challenges inherent as a human in physical form as guideposts toward conscious transcendence.

Individual Sessions

Our one on one sessions are individualized to meet each person’s unique need. The tools that I draw on include my background in psychotherapy and expressive arts, functional and holistic medicine, shamanic practices, astrology and oracle readings. Most of my clients meet via Zoom; however, once shelter in place restrictions are removed, we can meet in person in my home office.

Personal Retreats

If you are called to take our work deeper, you may want to consider scheduling a personal retreat. These are typically 2 days (can be weekend or weekdays). We will gather in my home nestled near the Sonoran Desert Preserve in Arizona. The retreat is uniquely designed to meet each individual’s goals and needs. I incorporate ritual, art, somatic healing, breathwork, meditation, yoga, astrology and/or shamanic journeying to customize each person’s experience. Prior to your retreat, we will meet via Zoom to tease out what you passionately desire to experience and what outcomes you want to achieve from our time together.
Accommodations and travel are not included but I will assist you in making these arrangements. Delicious vegetarian/vegan organic meals are included.

Sedona Hike

Living With a Type 1 Diabetic and Other Musings

It’s been 2 years since I last updated this blog. So much has transpired over that time that it’s hard to know where to begin. Over the next few months, I intend to let my story unfold for you. I feel in my heart that I have something worth sharing with you. That my journey is your journey. Whether or not you resonate with my process, I know that I cannot keep it to myself. I must write about it, share it–for whatever purpose it fulfills.

To that end, I begin my story at the urging of my partner to write about what’s it is like to live with a Type 1 Diabetic (T1D). I met Todd last year and when we began dating, he informed me that he was a diabetic.  At the time,  I had no idea how involved I would become in his life and nor how his diabetes would affect me. Todd is writing a book on T1D–and asked me to contribute a chapter on what it is like to live with a T1D.. I share part of that story with you now.

FEATURE STORY

It’s 3:45 AM, I reach across the bed to place my arm over Todd. My arm falls on a mound of wet sweaty sheets. As I begin to awaken, I hear a spoon clanging against a bowl from the kitchen.  The hall light is softly illuminating the bedroom. I roll out of bed and make my way down the hall to the kitchen. Todd is leaning over the kitchen bar shoveling spoonfuls of cereal and almond milk into mouth. He’s not speaking, he barely notices me.

“What was your blood sugar?” I ask.

“48 “, he responds.

I know better than to ask: “how do you feel.?” I know how he feels –he feels terrible. He can’t think clearly, he is sweating profusely, his balance is unsteady. He’s scared, he has to get sugar into his body, fast. I wait for him to finish his food. Soon he begins to come around and we check his blood glucose again.

78.

That’s better. I think we can go back to bed now.

All during the previous day, Todd was checking his blood sugar at frequently regular intervals trying to get an idea of when his blood glucose spikes after eating and how long he can go between meals before it starts to fall drastically. He’s trying to figure out how to set his insulin pump so his blood sugar levels resemble more of rolling hills rather than peaks and valleys.Until I met Todd, I had very little contact with anyone with T1D.

I am a nurse practitioner and often see patients with Type 2 Diabetes–a whole different disease. I coach Type 2 Diabetics on proper nutrition, exercise and supplements and how to best manage their disease. It’s possible to reverse Type 2 diabetes; it’s preventable. It comes about because of one’s lifestyle choices. Type 1 is completely different and more rare.

Type 1 diabetes usually manifests during childhood or young adulthood.   It is an autoimmune condition where the body attacks the beta cells located within a cluster of cells in the pancreas known as the islet of Langerhans.  The beta cells are responsible for producing insulin.  They sense sugar in the blood and then release the necessary amount of insulin to maintain normal blood sugar levels. It is not yet completely understood why some people’s immune system, which is supposed to protect you, mistakenly attacks and destroys these beta cells. Trauma is thought to be one of the causes triggering the body to attack its beta cells.

Todd’s condition was diagnosed when he was 14, during a very traumatic period of time in his life.Insulin is crucial to life.  Without it, glucose cannot move from one’s bloodstream into the cells of the body to provide them with energy to function.  When the pancreas fails to produce insulin, blood glucose levels rise preventing the body from functioning properly.  Overtime, high glucose levels damage nerves, blood vessels, organs and eventually cause death.

Living with a T1D has been an eye-opening experience. There is constant pricking of your finger and checking your blood sugar–first thing in the morning, after breakfast, mid morning, before lunch, mid afternoon, before dinner, after dinner, before bed…sometimes in the middle of the night. It means adjusting the insulin pump to raise or lower the blood sugar, it means eating at regular intervals and carefully planning what you eat. If you don’t, you may end of eating anything within reach just to get the blood sugar to functional levels. It means being diligent whether you want to or not. It means that before you do anything in morning, you must attend to your blood sugar/insulin relationship. You have no choice. If you don’t, you will die.

When we were first dating, I thought it was a novelty when we would stop and check his blood sugar levels. I often joined in. We compared numbers–and planned our next meal or snack around his blood sugar levels. He would adjust his pump if too high or too low. I didn’t have to do anything. My pancreas would figure that out for me and administer the correct dose of insulin at precisely the right time and the right intervals. But Todd has to figure that out for himself and program his pump to do what my body does without me thinking about it–as long as I take care of myself, my pancreas will take care of me.

I am learning to be more appreciative of my body, to feed it regular meals and never to take it for granted. I am learning how fortunate I am that my body works really well. I have very few health issues and mostly what I do have–achy joints and the tightness in my neck or shoulders– is manageable with stretching, yoga, massage, rest, etc.

Todd needs to plan his day with great attention to detail. He didn’t always do so and he is paying for it now with damaged vision and peripheral neuropathy (nerve damage in his legs and feet). There are other side effects too, and we don’t even know some of the long-term damage that may occur from the drastic blood sugar swings that have ravaged his body for so many years.

For many years I struggled to be in my body.  I frequently ignored its signals of hunger, fatigue, pain.  I pushed myself to keep going when I should have stopped to rest.  I exercised rigorously to stay in shape, lose weight or keep those dreaded extra pounds at bay.  Often I skipped meals either because I was too busy to stop and eat or because I thought starving myself would help me attain that perfect body.  Then there were those times when I would polish off a carton of coconut ice cream or a bag of chips–my body craving immediate gratification.  As I grew to love myself and listen to my body’s messages,  I began to find refuge being in my body.  It’s still something I am getting used to.

More recently I was experiencing some old thoughts and patterns reminiscent of my early days with my disordered eating and body dysmorphism.  Frustrating because I thought I had laid this behind me.  Then in walks Todd into my life, and I get to look at this head on.  I am a firm believer that there are no accidents.  I know without a shred of doubt that Todd and I were brought together for some very important reasons.  I know if he had not met me and my access to cutting edge health care, he would be on a rapid train ride to some serious and likely irreversible medical problems.  I have a strong intuition that he and I have something very important to share with the others regarding his healing journey to health.

But I wasn’t aware of how impactful his journey would have on me.  I had no idea that I would get to face my unfinished business regarding my relationship with my body.

Living with a T1D requires patience, compassion, understanding, commitment.  I am as committed to his health as he is and fortunately he is fiercely committed to his health.   Just like an infant who cries incessantly until he is fed,  Todd’s body requires the same attendance.  You can’t reason with a baby and let him know that gee, this isn’t a good time to stop and eat.  We’re too busy, too tired, too cranky to attend to your needs. Todd’s body won’t listen to any “reasoning”.    When his blood sugar gets low, he HAS to eat.  When it gets too high, he HAS to adjust his insulin pump.

I call him at work sometimes and ask him if he has eaten.  When we prepare dinner, we cook for 4 so we have dinner for two and lunch the next day for the both of us.  Being prepared is key to living healthily as a diabetic.  It’s important for all of us–diabetic or not.  It used to never bother me if I ran out of food in the house.  I could always grab a protein bar for breakfast and run to Whole Foods or other healthy deli for lunch.  Now when I see food getting low  in our refrigerator, I panic.  We need to replenish–now.

We never leave the house for a hike, a drive or a bike ride without food.  We never go anywhere without his glucose monitor, we always make sure there is extra insulin on hand.  Meals are planned out, carbs are counted, most food is prepared at home.  Gone are the days for him of pizza, sandwiches, fast foods, convenience foods, sugary foods.

I cannot and will not ever ignore that Todd has T1D.  Yes some days it is a huge inconvenience.  Some days it would be so nice to just to lay in bed and get up for a late leisurely breakfast.  Some days it would be nice not to have to sleep with an insulin pump next to me.  His disease is part of our relationship, it doesn’t define who he is or who we are.  But it is something that we both attend to every day.  I am seeing how much it requires of him to manage his blood sugar:insulin:food ratio.  I want to help him.  To take some of the stress and responsibility from him.  He managed it by himself for over 40 years.   He doesn’t have to do that anymore.  It is not a burden and it never occurred to me to not be with him because he has T1D.  But I can truthfully say that I had no idea how involved it is to live with this disease.

For those of you interested in reading more about Todd’s personal journey on becoming a Type 1 Diabetic and what he is now doing to heal this condition, you can access his Kindle version here.

A Journey to Love

With the best of intentions I started my unexpected retreat in wine country. Every morning I would meditate, then do yoga, write, eat exquisitely well, take long nature hikes and allow Spirit to reveal to me the next steps on my journey. I figured this would be a transformational time and I knew it would be about love, but that’s about all I knew. Everything else was a mystery.

What I didn’t know is that what I needed first and foremost was rest. I was exhausted! Not just from all the packing, sorting, storing, and releasing that was required to prepare for the move (a much bigger than I anticipated!) More than this, I was tired from working hard, from being driven to live a fulfilled life.

I always found time to work, to meditate, to do yoga, to work out, to spend time with friends, to travel, to see my family, to do things I love like cook and garden and be in nature…yet much of that came out of place within me that believed that this is how I needed to live to live and fulfilled and inspired life.

Some of this was right on; I was doing what for me amounts to a fulfilled and inspired life. But at the same time I was seeing that part of my life was being lived from a belief that I wasn’t good enough and I drove myself to overcompensate for that belief. I also recognized that I was holding a belief that in order for the Universe to take care of me, I needed to work really, really hard. No wonder I was exhausted!

My first day in slow down mode was very sloooow. I could barely move and didn’t leave my sanctuary at all. I couldn’t. My body refused to move any faster than its slowest gear. I slept, drank tea, nourished myself with good food and slept some more. But my mind was still in fast gear, totally running amok. At some point I realized I had two choices: to either listen to and believe all the thoughts and comments that were arising in my head or to simply observe them. Things got a little blurry here; sometimes I watched and listened, other times I was totally caught up in them. And this went on for hours, that turned into days. And the great gift was that I got to see what was underneath my very busy life: the driving forces of anxiety and fear.

“The quieter you become, the more you can hear”

I don’t know who to credit with that quote but it is so true. My time in the vineyards of Dry Creek Valley have given me the space and opportunity to look at what is working for me in my life and what is holding me back from being my full, juicy, outrageous self.

Deep and lasting change doesn’t always come quickly and easily, at least not for me! I would, at times, make an agreement with myself to do something differently or intend to practice gratitude more fervently or be more mindful, and then I’d find myself slipping back into some old patterns that weren’t congruent with my intentions. But with a little prodding and inner encouragement I would course correct and find myself back on track.

Among the things I’ve learned during this time of retreat is to practice extreme compassion with myself and the understanding that forgiveness is a process. Forgiveness is not about condoning someone else’s behavior. In fact, it’s really not about the other person at all. Rather, it’s about setting yourself free so you can heal and be empowered enough to move on and free up space inside for things like love and joy.

I’ve also had to practice humility in graciously accepting the kindness of others. I discovered that I have friends who care about me dearly, who love me without me having to give anything in return except to be my most truest self. I know that the Universe or Spirit or God, whatever term you want to use, does care and love me and that Grace is available to us at all times, we just have to be open to it.

I am learning to live in the moment, to practice what Eckhart Tolle writes about in the Power of Now: While I may not know what will happen or where I’ll be 1, 2, or 6 months from now, as long as I stay focused, and keep trusting and listening to my inner guidance, I will be OK.  And for right now in this moment, I am OK. In fact, I better than OK, I am thriving, I am happy and healthy and I am very, very blessed.

May Updates

Signs of new growth are bursting forth everywhere I look these days. From mustard blooming faithfully between rows of woody grape vines, to the trees in a full regale of white, rose, and pink blossoms. With this seasonal rebirth and the beginning of longer days it feels like playtime, especially out in the bounty of nature. Everyone just seems to be happier. And I, too, feel like I am finally emerging from a period of retreat and introspection.

Recently I’ve enjoyed some awesome hikes along the coast where fresh wild greens and flowers make the landscape luscious and bright with sweet color. I also went to a Giant’s game, which is always a pastime enjoyed when the days stretch on into a slow, golden sunset. I just celebrated my birthday and it’s fitting that this is the beginning of a fresh, new year in my life for major changes are afoot!  I spent 5 glorious days on the Mendocino coast for my birthday and took advantage of its beauty and remoteness to listen to my inner guidance for my next steps on this journey of life.

I had imagined that the next time I would be writing to you, I would be telling you about relocating to Austin, Texas for a new adventure brought about by a job offer. However, just a few days before my scheduled departure from Northern California I received a notice that the job offer had been rescinded and the move was off! After recovering from the shock and disbelief I needed to figure out what I was going to do next. And figure it out quickly because I had already rented out my home, quit my jobs and packed my belongings.

Before I had much time to react, I was gifted the opportunity to stay in a beautiful guest home nestled among acres of vineyards and surrounded with hills and trees not far from a beautiful lake. So, I loaded my car with what belongings I thought I would need and made the trip north to what would be my sanctuary for the next few months.

I didn’t know much but I did know this: I was being asked to surrender and trust a force greater than my small self and that I was being taken care of. I had the strongest feeling during the drive that I was on a journey to love. What that really meant and how that would unfold has yet to be revealed. Yet it is with love that I share some of the highlights of this time of uncertainty and the insights that simply trusting has revealed to me in my next post.

Holiday Greetings

Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love.
 – Hamilton Wright Mabi

I want to take this opportunity to wish all of you a very joyous and peaceful holiday season and to thank you for your continuous and unwavering support throughout this past year. I look forward to serving you in whatever capacity I can in the New Year. We are poised for an exciting year filled with opportunities for growth and expansion in so many areas, especially around health and consciousness.

I’m not big on making New Year’s resolutions, but I do like to take time to reflect on the past year and see what is enriching my life and what makes me feel good.  Additionally, I’ll assess what didn’t work, hone in on what is draining and distracting. This helps me to make adjustments in the present moment so I can expect different outcomes as I move forward. I’ll write these reflections in a journal and sometimes I’ll make a vision board about how I want to feel and what I want to create in my life for the new year. When I get in touch with my core desired feelings, I am able to be clear about what I want.

If what you want for 2013 is more health and vitality, then you may be interested in one or both of the programs I’m offering in January. The first is my 21 Day Whole Body Cleanse. It’s a great way to kick off the new year and release all the those toxins that may be accumulating during this holiday season. It’s also a great jump start to a weight loss program. One of my previous participants just emailed me to say that she lost 22 pounds during the detox and went on to lose another 10 pounds for a total of 32 pounds!  

My wish for you in 2013, is that may you move more fully into who you are, that you have more joy, experience (even more) health and vitality, and that Love fills you from the inside out and from the outside in.

With Love and Kindness and Holiday Blessings,

Rachelle

November 2012

The journey between what you once were and who you are now becoming is where the dance of life really takes place. – Barbara Deangelis

This is such a great time of the year! The trees and vines are brilliant with their fall colors and the days are sunny and crisp while the nights are cool and (usually) clear. Along with most of us here in the Bay Area, I enjoyed watching the major league play offs and World Series with the Giants coming out as champions for the 2nd time in 3 years!  Over a million people gathered in San Francisco on Halloween to celebrate the victory.

October was an extra special month for me as both of my grandkids and my mother celebrate their birthdays. My granddaughter turned 16 (really?) and continues to enjoy her friends, school, cheerleading, and her car. My grandson turned 10 and loves his sports, especially football and soon, basketball. My mom turned 92 and proudly announced she got her driver’s license renewed for another 4 years!
For me it’s been an exciting month since my last newsletter. I spent a wonderful weekend on Tinsley Island in the Delta for their annual Women’s Cruise. I learned to paddle board (thanks to my patient instructor and host, Cynthia Bernheim), kayaked around the island a few times, and enjoyed a lot of dancing, yoga, and hanging out with amazing women.
I managed to squeeze in another weekend away and went up Healdsburg to meet my cousin and friends for wine tasting and bottling. The vines were especially beautiful and showing off their brilliant fall colors and all the growers and wine makers were happy with a bountiful harvest this year.
This month’s feature article focuses on the importance of using an integrated approach to healthy weight loss. True and lasting healing requires attention to the emotional, spiritual, and physical aspects of our selves. When we are out of balance in one area, this affects the whole, as mind, body, and spirit are one.
My whole approach to healing work is based in an integrated model, which experience tells me is essential for reclaiming and maintaining health and vitality. I hope you’ll find something useful and inspiring in this article. Let me know what you think!
With love and kindness,
Rachelle Goering, M.A., F.N.P.

Transformational Weight loss

Weight loss is a huge business with countless men and women struggling with obesity and overweight. Losing those excess pounds and maintaining that loss is not for the faint of heart. It requires dedication, commitment, a willingness to change, and the courage to look at the underlying issues that contribute to overeating, emotional eating, or choosing the wrong kinds of foods.
Transformational weight loss is about transforming your relationship with food, your body, and your Self. Ultimately it’s about transforming your approach to life and learning to truly nourish yourself on all levels: physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
For some, it may be about transforming your state of health from “sick and tired” to “vibrant and energetic”. For others shifting from depression and low self-esteem to self-confidence and personal empowerment is the key. Weight loss is so much more than reaching a specific number on the scale. Transformational weight loss can take you from fear and stagnation to finding and fulfilling your life’s purpose.  
Physical Transformation
My approach to weight loss uses a customized integrated system. I look at an individual’s biochemistry through sophisticated lab work and metabolic assessment forms that my patients complete when they come to me. I also evaluate their current nutritional status and eating habits. Patients complete a food and mood diary so we can see not only what they are eating and when, but how that food affects their emotions and their energy levels.
We may even do food sensitivity testing. Often people are sensitive to foods and don’t even know it because their symptoms are subtle or delayed or both. It may take up to 4 or 5 days for some symptoms to reveal themselves and by then you may not have a clue that it was the corn tortilla you ate last Sunday that is giving you the belly ache or bloat you are feeling today.
With these tools and information at your disposal, the path to lasting physical transformation is clearer and in many ways easier to navigate.
Mental Transformation
Using your mind to help you lose weight is equally important. Align your subconscious with your weight loss goals by visualizing your body healthy and at your perfect weight. This will help you make wise choices around food and exercise. Yes, your mind can easily help you make healthful choices instead of always thinking about hot fudge sundaes or pizza!
You mind can also help you to discover a deep appreciation for your body and develop a positive relationship with food. It is the power of the mind that lets you learn to eat without stress or fear so you don’t trigger the hormones that cause you to eat more and turn much of what you eat into stored fat.
Emotional Transformation
Discovering the feelings, thoughts, and stories you have around food that underlie the habits and compulsions that are sabotaging your health and fitness is one of the most important steps to weight loss.
Self-defeating thoughts and emotions can drive a person to overeat, causing more self-loathing and low self-esteem that perpetuate the cycle of overeating because you feel so bad about your self that you are driven to eat to try to numb out those feelings.
Compassion and patience can replace the angst and fear around food and eating. The more you develop a healthy relationship with your body and self, the more you will WANT to choose to take care of yourself by eating healthy foods in an environment that is nurturing and pleasant. This change in perspective helps you live life to the fullest without unhealthy habits or addictive behaviors continually holding you back.
Spiritual Transformation
The more you believe in yourself and the better you feel about yourself, the more capable you are navigating life’s challenges successfully and potently. You can rise above self-doubt by trusting in yourself. It is possible to transcend negative thinking and release unhealthy relationships and move into a state of peace and self-confidence.
Putting it All Together
When working with a client on weight loss, or any health issue, I individualize my approach depending on the unique needs and history of that person. It is never a one-size-fits-all approach. Each person’s physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual history is unique and must be taken into careful consideration to achieve success.
I love the one-on-one relationship I develop with each patient and find that the most successful are those that see me on a regular basis, checking in with me either in person or virtually at least weekly. Our interactions are not about judging success or failure, but more about identifying right or wrong behaviors and understanding where and how I can best support each person.
Success is not about reaching a specific number on the scale. It’s so much more than that. It’s about changing one’s lifestyle, internal belief system, and shifting negative thinking to compassion for one’s self. It’s about trust, and healing and feeling good inside your skin.
Sometimes the changes you make are big strides, sometimes baby steps are a cause for great celebration. And sometimes there’s a slide backwards, but all of this is part of the process. Finding success is all about learning from what is and isn’t working, and getting up and starting again when we fall short of our ideal.
Partnering for Success 
My intention is to be your coach, your guide, your confidante, the wind beneath your wings!  I develop life-long relationships with my patients so I can be there when they lose their footing, need a little assistance to get back on course, or just need to check in from time to time.
Change doesn’t come easy for most of us and old habits are sometimes extremely hard to break. We can all use a compassionate comrade to rely on who won’t judge us or fault us if we slip and fall. I hope I can be that someone for you when you most need it.

September 2012

Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony. – Thomas Merton

As I write this month’s newsletter, my heart is brimming with gratitude and appreciation for my wonderful family and the adventures we shared this summer.

I’ve just returned from a beautiful holiday with 50 of my Goering relatives. Every other year, my father’s siblings and their spouses, children, nieces, nephews, and every other familial relation all gather somewhere in the contiguous United States to reminisce, catch up on the latest from each other’s lives, play games, hike, sing, eat, and simply enjoy each other’s presence.

This year we gathered in Logan, Utah. The family congregated at a local hotel and enjoyed great food, numerous games of Scrabble and Taboo, lively conversations, and one heck of a talent show! Despite all this, I think the highlight of the weekend was the 7 elders sharing memories, insights, and stories from their long and colorful lives. We’ve been reuniting like this for the past 34 years and are fortunate that all of my father’s siblings are still living. At 92, my father is the oldest of The Magnificent 7. I feel incredibly blessed to have such a loving and fun-filled extended family!

Earlier last month, my daughter and granddaughter flew out from Kansas to spend a week with me. We headed up to Tahoe where we enjoyed swimming, shopping, and hiking. We even found a little time for relaxation too! In addition to this girls-only reunion, just a few days before I left for the family reunion, I spent a fun filled weekend in Carmel with a group of friends. So it’s been a delightful summer filled with loved ones and I’m not quite ready for it to end!

Whether it is the love and support of good friends and family, rewarding work, strong faith, or good health, we all have aspects of life to relish and be deeply grateful for. These things also take investment and with that, balance. This month’s article is about finding that balance so that we may have enough to give to each part of our lives, with enough left in reserve for our selves.

With love and kindness,

Rachelle Goering, M.A., F.N.P.